


call out my name

by 17blackk



Series: summer wine [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-23 12:50:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14934581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/17blackk/pseuds/17blackk
Summary: Taeyong is feeling down, these days. Doyoung tries his hardest to make it better.





	call out my name

**Author's Note:**

> this takes place before "at least as deep as the pacific ocean"

It's been a tough month for Taeyong.

 

They don't talk about it, (they never do), but Doyoung watches him a lot, and he's seen him go through so much shit in such a short time he honestly thanks God the pink-haired boy hasn't tried to end it all.

He had to contact his mother despite their _chaotic_ relationship because he needed her regarding some papers and birth certificates and other unnecessary shit people always seem to want to see before hiring someone. He was born, wasn't he? Why would they need an actual fucking _sheet of paper_ proving it?

 

He was so upset that he stayed almost completely silent for three days after having to talk to her. He wouldn't eat or get out of his room if not absolutely necessary. Doyoung isn't even sure he showered. Jaehyun was so worried he had to cancel all of his plans with _frat boys & co. _(as Doyoung likes to call them) in order to stay home with him. (Doyoung kept coming over anyway.)

 

He did get the damn birth certificate, in the end. But he still didn't get the job.

 

The thing is, Taeyong didn't really need the money right now since he was still living off a big enough inheritance from his rich grandmother who had also somehow paid for all of his studies before passing away; but he still felt the need to work because _I'm so useless, Doyoung._ After failing only one interview, though, he was so disappointed in himself that he didn't even try to apply somewhere else. Doyoung and Jaehyun were kind of happy that he forgot about working altogether, because he was already tired enough, but they both knew that the lingering feeling of failure would be there for a while.

 

There were also final exams. Taeyong had missed a lot of classes, this semester, fatigue seeping into his bones and keeping him from going anywhere, and even though he got the notes from at least five different classmates in every course, he still felt like missing the actual thing was going to lead him to failure. Doyoung kept telling him it wouldn't make any difference, that he would be okay as long as he studied, but Taeyong was always afraid of failing at anything and everything for no reason.

 

Not getting a job wasn't a big deal for students, the lack of experience and the difficult part-time schedules were almost always a problem. Doyoung also knew he would get good grades, because Taeyong was way too hard-working to fail shit. But it was Taeyong, and the smallest issue could turn him into a mess.

 

It's been a tough month for Doyoung, too.

 

He and Jaehyun had done a pretty good job getting Taeyong's shit back together, but Doyoung realized it was also hard being around someone who had depression. For a while, he felt like he was responsible for Taeyong's life, like saying _one_ word or leaving _one_ minute too soon could make Taeyong feel even more shitty. Taeyong is feeling a little bit better, now, but his bad days are always a scary thing to witness, and they never know if he's really okay or if it's just the calm before the storm.

 

 

**To:** **tae [13:36** **pm** **]**

_exams finished_

_want me to come over?_

 

 

Doyoung is already on his way as he sends the text. Since Taeyong isn't the most communicative lately, he wouldn't dare ask for company even if loneliness would kill him, so Doyoung just keeps pretending he's the one who asks if he can come by.

 

 

**From: tae [13:37pm]**

_yeah if u still want to_

 

(There's nothing in the world Doyoung would rather do.)

 

***

 

Doyoung just got out of his last final, and he walks with a spring in his step, thinking he actually did pretty good. He then realizes he hasn't been thinking about his own grades that much, thoughts of Taeyong plaguing his mind so much he couldn't even find a minute for himself. Not that it was important anyway.

 

As he reaches Taeyong and Jaehyun's front door, he hears a loud and annoying laugh. He freezes, trying to recognize the voice.

 

_Oh my god,_ he thinks. _The frat boys._ His mood changes right this second.

 

He walks through the door without knocking. Would they even hear him anyway?

 

« Isn't that my boy Doyoung? » Yuta immediately _yells_ upon seeing him.

 

« Not your boy, asshole, » Doyoung mumbles, taking off his shoes, dodging a headlock and passing by Youngho who's sitting on the couch. Youngho is actually smart enough to know it's better not to say shit.

 

He finds a sheepish looking Jaehyun in the kitchen, taking soda cans out of the fridge.

 

« Hey, uh… sorry, I, they both knew I wasn't doing anything so, they kinda decided to come over and uh, » he tries to explain.

 

« It's okay, you big baby, as if I care, » Doyoung cuts him off without real bite.

 

Jaehyun laughs.

 

« Alright, bitch. Taeyong's in his room. We're leaving, anyway. »

 

Doyoung is glad, but he doesn't want to be mean to Jaehyun, so he shuts his mouth and makes his way to Taeyong's room.

 

He opens the door slowly. The room is dark, the blinds drawn, and he finds Taeyong curled up under his covers. Without asking, he takes off his jacket and goes to the bed.

 

« Hey, » he says softly,

 

« Doyoungie, » Taeyong's small face pokes out of the lump of covers, and Doyoung could cry for hours about how cute he looks.

 

He moves to make room for Doyoung.

 

« I feel bad that I hate them so much, » Taeyong says into Doyoung's chest, once they're in a comfortable position. 

 

Doyoung knows he's talking about Jaehyun's friends.

 

« I don't know, they're pretty stupid, I guess, »

 

« Youngho's nice, though, » Taeyong adds after a minute.

 

They settle into a comfortable silence, only broken by the sound of the front door closing when Jaehyun and his friends leave.

 

« How was the exam? » Taeyong asks softly.

 

« Easier than I expected. It's not a big grade anyway, so I don't care that much, »

 

Taeyong kicks him in the shin.

 

« Every grade is important, you bitch, » he hisses. Doyoung tries not to laugh.

 

« How was yours? » Doyoung asks, though he doesn't want to. Taeyong's last exam was hours before Doyoung's, early in the morning, and it was the hardest subject even according to Jaehyun.

 

« I don't know, » Taeyong mumbles.

 

« I'm sure you did great. You always do, »

 

Taeyong doesn't answer. Doyoung lets him be.

 

They fall asleep at some point. Doyoung wakes up before Taeyong and takes a minute to look at his peaceful face. He wishes Taeyong would always look this relaxed.

He decides he's going to try to extricate himself carefully from Taeyong's hold so as to go make them some tea, but at the slightest movement, Taeyong wakes up.

 

They stare at each other for a split second. Something's wrong.

 

« No, » Doyoung starts, but it's already too late.

 

Taeyong starts crying.

 

Waking up from a nap always makes Taeyong feel fucking weird, and he hates the feeling of not knowing what time it is, if it's the same day or if it's already tomorrow, but it's even worse now, with how bad he's been feeling.

 

Doyoung immediately scoops him into his arms, and Taeyong clings to him like he's the only thing keeping him alive. (Maybe he is.)

 

« Tae, Tae, please, no, » Doyoung panics. It's not the first time he sees Taeyong cry, but it's always overwhelming.

 

It was about time, though, Doyoung knows this. Taeyong has been trying so hard to keep himself together, avoiding the breakdown to go through his exams, but now that's it's over, he needs to take it all out.

 

Doyoung kisses his head and lets him cry into his chest until he has no tears left to spill, telling him that _it's okay, you're okay, I got you_. After a while, his sobs turn into hiccups.

 

« I'm so tired, Doyoung, » Taeyong says weakly. His voice is a mess from having cried this much.

 

Doyoung holds him tight. He knows Taeyong isn't talking about something in particular.

 

« You'll be okay, Tae, I'll do anything, » Doyoung promises. « I'll do anything, » he repeats softly.

 

« Just... just stay, » Taeyong almost begs. 

 

 

Doyoung never planned on going anywhere.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this sucks even more than part 1 but hey :/  
> I think my writing style is weird and I hate it  
> this has become a series (apparently??) so stay tuned
> 
> hmu on curiouscat : https://curiouscat.me/hyukkwon


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